Section: Misc → Lessons
Importance: Helpful tips for men
Misogyny Rating: 8

Weaker Sex My Ass!
Excerpted from: "Why I love Broads"

Not in the face, not in the face

Keep in mind, I don't really want a sex change operation, but there are some serious advantages to being a woman.

It's been my contention for awhile that women have it better off in this life than men. Men are so goofy stupid falling over themselves for women, how could it not be. Although I believe that men do have the upper hand in dealing with most uncomfortable conditions, (e.g. Uncomfortable chairs, ugly cars, ill fitting clothing) women do maintain dominance with one kind of discomfort. Wiping your ASS!

This is the one way in which women are tougher than men. Women don't even care what kind of toilet paper they use. Women can wipe down with any kind of rolled up porcupine or 20 grade ass ripper you can find. They don't care about ply, or quilted, just dry it off and lets keep going.

I think the difference is ass hair. When you've got a lot, a simple clean up turns into a biological disaster. A mass of ass grass turns your anal reactor into a Chernobyl of a clean up. After a rigorous going over I feel like I've been taken by every guy in D block. If you meat a woman with an unhappy trail down her back crack, she's probably swimming for the East Germans.

So have a little sympathy ladies. If you had all the butt rug we do, the tables would be different. And don't come wining to us about your periods and how rough that is. We have to live through every rough moment with you. And just like you, every month it takes us by surprise. You don't think we get your periods, believe me we do. At least your period only strikes once a month. We've got to shit every day and wake up with morning wood.

Here are some more obvious comparisons between men and women, and why being a woman is better.

Ability Men Women
Peeing standing up X  
Looking distinguished as they get older X  
Get people to do stuff by shoving jiggly puffsin their face   X
Large abundance of ass hair X  
A weeks worth of pain and bleeding every month   X
Explainable irrational behavior 25% of your life.   X
Morning Wood Every Damn Day!!! X  
Special item between legs that controls the minds of others   X
Special item between legs that controls own brain and actions X  
Never paying for a drink   X
Never paying for sex   X
Wearing fun outfits like pleather skirts and GoGo boots X X
Don't have to take pants off to masturbate   X
Can withhold sex   X
Can make out with your friends and that doesn't make you gay   X
You have your own jiggly puffs!   X